Friday, January 11, 2013

Hawaii Day 9 In Which We Soak Up the Hawaii Five-0 Vibe

Back when I was trying to find somewhere to stay in Waikiki, I happened upon a listing for a condo at the Ilikai Hotel. I’ve always wanted to stay at here so I was super happy to find a condo with three bedrooms that would fit us all nicely. I got happier and happier to learn first that it was an ocean view condo, and then that it was actually on the top floor of the hotel. It was the freakin penthouse! And not just any penthouse, but the iconic penthouse of Hawaii Five-0 fame, where Jack Lord stands on the balcony and the helicopter zooms in to take a shot of him.

Check this out on YouTube:

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The condo is probably one of the best places I’ve ever stayed: sweeping views of Waikiki and the pacific, a cool seventies feel to the place with original avocado appliances, floor to ceiling  windows and mirrors and cool marble tile floors. We kept expecting to see Hugh Hefner sitting in one of the lounge chairs or anyone in a white suit surrounded by scantily clad women.

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I must admit to being a little worried when I booked the place as I have a bit of an issue with heights, as you may have gathered reading previous posts from me. I had a little talk with myself about not being a complete idiot and that I MUST NOT inflict my fears on my kids, and to generally just get a grip. I listened to myself for about 5 seconds, and then decided to go straight to the inflicting, by begging/lecturing/ordering everyone to follow a list of rules regarding the deck, me, and the 26 floors below.

  1. do not joke about jumping over the railing.
  2. do not pretend to push, throw, jostle, nudge, or chuck anyone or anything over the railing.
  3. do not pretend to trip and fall thereby hurling yourself over the railing.
  4. do not even talk about doing any of these activities anywhere where I can hear you.
  5. do not exchange eye-rolling with another member of the group if you see me crawling around on the floor.
  6. do not shake your head and walk off muttering rude things about me if you see me bent over with my arms outstretched, white-faced, and lurching back into the condo.
  7. do not try to bribe me to come out on the deck.
  8. do not hide somewhere on the deck and then make a loud screaming noise that gets progressively quieter.
  9. do not play Blind Man’s Bluff on the deck.
  10. do not use the deck chair as a pretend springboard.

Having read everyone the Riot Act, I was pleasantly surprised to see that the nice people who had designed the Ilikai back in 1963, had with the exception of one corner, installed a very solid-looking three foot wide ledge all the way around the building just below the deck so that it was not necessary to look straight down into the swirling depths of the building. This was extremely thoughtful of them and made it so that I could actually manage to walk out on the deck, and even hold on to the railing without looking like I had just been dug up from my grave.

I still felt like the entire world had spun off its axis if I was out there for too long.

The best comment came from Silas, though, who I overheard asking his dad: “Would it be OK, if Jane’s not out here, for me to walk on the ledge?”

Even I had to laugh when I heard that.

Believe it or not, I actually took these photos!

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View to the right.

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View to the left.

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Down to the Lagoon. Yes, it’s on a bit of an angle. Rule #11: Do not mention that my photos from the deck suck.

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Straight down to the pool, taken by me holding my camera out over the edge while looking the other way…Still makes me feel queasy to even look at this photo…

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Straight ahead, people.

I won’t bore you with anymore pics, as you probably get the idea…

I will mention, however, that I especially enjoyed the elevator that zoomed to the top of the building, zipping past all the other floors on its way to ‘PH’.

I also enjoyed this sign in the elevator  for the local coffee shop, where, apparently, they don’t serve coffee, and also, they don’t roast themselves. What a relief.

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Needless to say, we were diggin’ this sweet place on top of the world and I plan to retire here as soon as possible.

Thanks for reading,



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