Oslo Day 4-5...?: In Which Norwegian is Hard, The Scream is as Expected, and a Surprising Upset Happens at Disco Bowling

Reindeer antlers, anyone? A little old lady was selling them at a local market. I tried to ask her about them but she was the first person I've met who didn't speak a jot of English.

Norwegian seems to be a virtually impossible language to 'pick up' on the go. Spoken Norwegian at any rate. I have barely been able to grasp only three words spoken to me: 'tak' (thanks), 'nei' (no), and 'hei hei' (hi); not exactly the stuff of genius for me figure those words out. Otherwise, it's all a bunch of sing-songy 'n's,  'ew's, and 'ya's strung together in some sort of impenetrable fortress of a language that is impossible to scale. Enter Google Lens, which has been a mix of helpful and unhelpful, but always entertaining. If you're not familiar, it's another Google invention that allows you to hold your phone camera up to a sign or text, translating the text into English (or whatever language) right over top. 

For example, take this milk carton: (as an aside, it's fully Christmas here - I kind of love it!)

That's Norway in a Nutshell for you right there: a helpful farm-hand Santa works at the local dairy, where he eats porridge with butter and does Santa tricks. He also eats seven punches. I'm not exactly sure what this means, but it's probably something to do with drinking glog seven days a week. I think the 'Good July' may be wrong...

We were riding on one of Oslo's various means of public transportation - a tram I think, of which there are many- when I spotted this sign:

 

In case you can't read that, it basically says that if you are at home with a migraine, you can call these guys and the DOCTOR WILL COME TO YOU AT YOUR HOME. They think it's WEIRD that you would have to get up from your sick bed and go to the doctor's office.

Let's break this down for a moment.

First of all, THEY HAVE DOCTORS. Fact: Everyone in Norway is assigned a GP.  At Zoe's university, the student healthcare website has a drop-down menu where you can make an appointment to see a doctor, or a dentist, get a vaccine, or access mental health care. At the bottom of the screen, there is a second option where you can click a button if you would like a second opinion about some healthcare you have received. Hahahhhahh. Imagine there being enough doctors around that you could get a second opinion if you wanted one. Most of us can barely get a first opinion in Canada these days.  

Secondly, not only do they have doctors, the doctor will MAKE A HOUSE CALL. Yes, they will come to your house. Imagine being a doctor with enough time to deliver this kind of healthcare. They probably aren't overworked and underpaid like our doctors either.

ANYWAY.

This is the view out the back of our flat- it's a multi-purpose building that houses a senior's centre. I've been enjoying checking in on the day's activities across the courtyard. Yesterday they held a quite vigourous exercise class, and today's was a drawing class, possibly in the style of Edvard Munch.

Coincidentally, we had also planned a visit to the Munch museum that day and so off we headed in the near dark and rain. The escalator display was impressive and it took forever to get up and down them all, including to the very top of the building where I am happy to report that I did not accidentally crash myself through the extensive angled glass windows to the ground hundreds of metres below. We were lucky in that the sun made a brief but inspiring appearance just before sunset. 

                                            

In the actual gallery, the place was crawling with anxious-looking security guards, especially around the main attraction, The Scream. I was wondering what was up with them when I remembered all the recent instances of climate change activists throwing mashed potatoes at the Mona Lisa, or gluing themselves to a VanGogh, and other such activities and I realized these guys were worried one of us was going to whip out a container of butter chicken and chuck it on The Scream. In fact, The Scream itself seemed quite worried this might happen too.

I did have some googly-eyes in my purse, but it was locked in a locker and so I missed my chance at some good solid mischief. I really think that is what this painting needs, but that's just me.

For some reason, no one has ever mentioned this painting of Darth Vader and Princess Leia enjoying a picnic also done by Munch.

We ended the day with some 10-pin disco bowling at a super fun venue right downtown. Good times - if I could please draw your attention to the winning score on the screen in the image on the right...

That's right, I somehow won by one point. I may also have had the most gutter balls so I don't really understand how that happened. You must have a degree in math to understand bowling scoring so I was glad there was a computer there to do it for us.

I'm sure you're all excitedly waiting to see what tomorrow's activity will be at the Senior's Centre. Stay tuned!